Laying in my bed , I was thinking about making a confession to myself so it just got started and I asked myself : tell me what you want ? and I gave the answer : you know it was hard to bear it , so I decided to lower the pain and then I started killing some specific things inside of me , it was just to make myself chill out . I was saying things that I really did not want to happen deep inside , I gave you my words It was not really what I wanted to happen but maybe it was the only way to make myself feel better and then I asked myself : There was no other choices ? and I gave the answer : You know it was maybe 2 years ago I was kind of inexperienced I don’t know what could I do ? there was pain and all I could do was killing the sickness inside of me so I started fighting my Instincts I was jealous , I WAS , but I could not bear the pain so I killed it inside of myself you know I used to tell myself the worst things could ever happen and then I was telling myself : so what girl ? I don’t want to see you getting hurt , You understand ?

It was like you see your boy sleeping with another girl and then you are like : So what? and you laugh and you can even enjoy it ! I think I was killing my consciousness ,You understand ? and now I am thinking if it was true what I have done or not ?

And then I asked myself : What have you concluded from these things happening to you and then I gave the answer : I found there is something more important , these things could have happened and then they just got happened , I needed a good friend , That was all , I didn’t care about other things , There was an 8 old girl inside of me she needed a good friend she never had , she didn’t care about biggies business , You know she had kind of imaginary world and it was not really imaginary it was her life it was what she needed , yes she was looking for a good friend . have you ever been in a long trip a very disgusting and trashy trip then if you are going through this alone you will feel like it’s too long , years , thousands years but when you have someone for instance a good friend it’s not that long , it’s short and joyful , you never want it to finish , You got it ?